Tag: inspiration

Eclectic Freedom

NO ONE IS YOU – AND THAT IS YOUR POWER

Rest assured and a deep breath in – you are one of a kind, and one of a kind for a reason. Understand that you don’t need to be understood by everyone. This is what filtered beauty really is. With good practice and soul searching throughout time, I’ve become free from thinking I need to fit into a certain profession, possessions, categories that define who I am. These type of weighing thoughts, or even wants do not exist in my life. This is not where my worth is defined. There’s not certain places I find myself that embody purpose but rather all places.

I value freedom the same way I value love and loyalty – It’s one of the most important aspects of my life. Freedom includes peace to just be. I hold dedication within myself to keep my heart open with not only ease but faith in that ease. I wish for everyone to understand that they don’t need to be defined – they don’t need to fit into a box or a set list of labels. Instead we can resemble all things that weave our heart and soul together. Dreams, ideas, projects, goals, time for all the things you’ve always wanted to do, learn, or visions of who you want to be.

For me, there is gold in understanding that my purpose isn’t in a search but in my current state. I prefer to wake up and be created anew. It truly depends on the day, and at the end of the day it’s important to rest my head knowing I didn’t chase a classification to fit into, I didn’t settle on fulfilling someone else’s expectations or doing what the people around me are doing. Instead I’ll spend my days in leisure with the balance of motivation to be exactly who I am called to be that day.

By nature, I’m only instilled and focused on beauty that resonates within. I wish to be pulled by all that’s alluring to who I am, deeply. I want to be taken to open fields of wild existence, to express and let loose all the parts that shape me. My floating ideas actually keep me grounded. And while some may think free spirits are too fierce, I find that those living in freedom are the most breath-taking creatures to exist. The ones unafraid to be themselves. The ones who express from a genuine place and understand that differences are planted as gifts and it is a pure duty to share.

You don’t have to change pieces of yourself that set you apart from others, these are the parts of you, where the right people at the right time, will show up to admire and love.  

I choose to be limitless. I don’t want to fall under one passion but a multitude. I don’t want to feel pressure when it comes to choosing what’s for me, instead I will be a magnet to all that’s finding it’s way towards me – And when it comes, it will find a home in my ever-growing heart that has a limitless capacity for admiration.

-Sadianne Joyce

Journal Entries: What inspires me? Am I allowing myself the space to create? Am I walking the paths my soul wishes for? A list of collectibles I love. What sparks my rooted gifts and ignites me to dig deeper? Who brings out the best in me? Do I love something for myself because I love it myself? Do I rely on approval by others? Am I fearless in all the right ways? Define eclectic. Define freedom.

My Testimony

 

close up colors landscape picture“The Lord is my Shepard – I lack nothing.

He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me besides the still waters.

He restores my soul.

He leads me to paths of righteousness.”

He makes me. He leads me. He restores me.

There was no other way. Every day and especially come night, I had a relationship with God – he came in to protect me. When I think of my childhood I think of my Mother. She had an energy about her that gave me safety. Even when her environment was unsafe, my Mother didn’t allow fear to cross her. Gods protection reminded me of my Mom, but I knew with Gods protection that it wasn’t just me that was kept safe, it was both her and I, my sister, my Father, everyone surrounding me – which made my relationship with God a priority. It’s as if he came to me and I surrendered. I knew that all would be okay as long as I followed this feeling and trusted a higher form of care. As a kid our relationship felt like the greatest, private tale of all time, yet it was real. It was existing, sometimes a gut feeling – I didn’t know precisely what this love was, but I knew I would never move in the opposite direction. And it carried me all the way to the next chapters of my life. When I think of my life and the testimony that belongs to me, there is not a certain moment that was a defining moment. My testimony has lived within me since I came to understand the safety that followed after I allowed God to take care of my family and I. Prayer would blossom out of me. I wasn’t taken to church religiously, but my mind understood the beautiful, miraculous wonders that something much larger had to of been the Creator. I wasn’t religious in terms of following a set of rules but I had an undeniable, personal relationship that I embrace to this day. Spirituality is my movement. Everyone around me knew that my experiences were outside the ordinary for a child my age, I grew up fast. I had no other choice, the same way God came in and took care of my life. Our safety. He made me lay down, rest, and realize he was the only one who could restore all of the hurt, fight and confusion.

My mom received a phone call, I heard the detective on the other line tell her to turn around, they found him. “Where is he?” My Mother asked. The detective responded and told her he would speak to her in person. I pushed my head into the seat and prayed the hardest I’ve ever prayed in my life. In that moment I felt the presence of God surround my being. It was clarification, understanding and knowing that the feeling I’ve been feeling, came over my body in full. I was no longer having just a taste of what my relationship was, I became fulfilled. I prayed so hard I could barely breathe. It was my initial reaction, to speak to God. To let him know that I am here. I am with him. He let me know he was with me.

“Please. Let him be okay.” I whispered. I would soon find out that he was. He was no longer in pain. No longer addicted. No longer fighting control. As I prayed, I felt as if my Dad was taking my hair, tucking it behind my ear, rocking me back and forth, telling me, “I am okay. And you will be too. Your mom. Your sister. The days to come. The man who will fill in. I am not far, I am here with you. I hear you, not in the way I used to. But you are all knowing and you will never go a day without my attention.”

The rest of the night is a blur. It could have been the tears covering my eyes or the sound of the scream I heard from my Mom when the detective told her they found my father dead. I stayed in the car when she went in to have the conversation. Looking at my sister in her car seat I wondered how this could be. Tears fell from my face, my sister in my arms. This was now my battlefield. His hurt is gone and ours will worsen for some time. But because God is with me, I will never fail, the pain will not last, understanding will come over my heart, it will take years but it will come. I will never lose sight of the proof that we have a protective God. My fathers death was a grudge that I held for awhile. Sadness turned into anger and anger turned into anxiety.

I fought to forgive my Father for all he has missed and all he will miss out on, for the love I poured from my small being, feeling as if I could have done better… Wishing I would have done more… I forgave him. For making my Mother a warrior, not because she wanted to be but because she had to be, she was a survivor while sometimes feeling like she was losing. I forgave him for leaving. He left me with the most powerful lesson. He didn’t leave me empty handed and I often wonder if he as well, had a relation with God that offered pure peace. It took me a long time to realize this. He introduced the purest, most powerful love. And this is where my strength comes from, the relationship I had with God as a young age. It wasn’t because of the experiences I went through but because of the faith my small being had. Sometimes we go through ultimate darkness so we are made to kneel down, to have one choice but to give ourselves to the one who holds reason and I made the choice to do so. Even when it didn’t make sense, it does now. And I understand that I have been encountering God in special ways ever since.

With arms wide open and a broken heart, anger in my soul, misunderstanding when happiness was present, unknowingly defending all pain, carefully taking myself out of joyful situations because it felt too good to be true, I remembered that this is not what God would want for me. And most certainly not my Father, who wished with his entire being – to give me the very best. I not only forgave my Dad. I forgave myself and let the weights drift from my shoulders. I let go and let God in, again, again and again. And each time I would find that same feeling of guidance, fulfillment, a sense that I was being waited for. Restoration occurred and I am now the woman I am today because of the witness I grew up to be. There is no other way, there is no other choice, God is the center of my life, and the reason as to why the gospel I take in is so moving.

I pray that those who have their own testimony share their voice with others. I pray that those receiving, dance to the gospel.

I pray that those who have not had the opportunity to experience such a relationship, open their hearts and realize the rest will follow.

Trust in this.

The rest will follow.

-Sadianne Joyce

“It takes courage to give voice to what we experience, the way a coyote howls: not just out of hunger, but out of visceral joy at being a part of the infinite secret revealed. In this way, we’re angels wrapped in skin and fur, racing through thicket after thicket because we sense what can’t be seen all around us.” -M. Nepo

November’s Essence

“It was November – the month of crimson sunsets, parting birds, deep, sad hymns of the sea, passionate wind-songs in the pines. Ann roamed through the pine-land alleys in the park and, as she said, let that great sweeping wind blow the fogs out of her soul.” -L.M. Montgomery

Leaves dance with ease, but not before shedding from the branches to then riding the breeze. A journey of essential transformation. I will let the breeze that feels like future frost ride through my body. There’s something thrilling about this current environment, standing outside of our bodies contentment. We must shift, gather strength and find ease.

I’ve always admired this season of my life, all that it teaches me. I will mirror the wild of November’s essence. May I be unapologetic to the transformation that must take place in order to become what’s in store. I will release and I will gain. I will define the beauty of what we cannot control, the freedom of shifting. The adjustment that’s needed in order for new purpose. I will dance with the breeze, I will inhale the cold shifting from fall into winter and I will find the warmth. I will not take the undressing of what once bloomed as a loss. I will not slip into worry and doubt. I will embrace nature in it’s most natural way – resting in God’s creation. I will listen to His voice when I am told to adjust and then trust.

When this voice is heard, it may not be what we prefer, it may not be warm, it may not be easy but it will embody purpose. Sometimes we deserve to just sit back and let blessed realizations come to us. When we answer calls from God we give all the harvesting we’ve done room to manifest.

With mornings that begin in darkness, the stars will still shine bright later come night. And with long nights, the sun will still rise and shine through the cracks of my curtains the next morning in the familiar spots I’ve observed. These small moments of enlightenment will remind me that through all I endure, beauty will still find me… When morning begins colder and nights rush to become darker, I can change my perspective from loss to opportunity in gaining creativity to build my own temple of a cozy, safe landing.

Seasons never alter drastically, but rather slowly. They take their time – without rush but still in confidence. Approvals are not needed, they will change regardless of where you stand or how you try to prevent what is made to happen. Your new season will lead up, carrying essentials and gems. Memories of what was let go of and advances of what was learned. Love and lesson. Wholeness and defining moments.

For me, a defining moment happened while I was writing this, in a quiet coffee shop, everything around me was still. My body cold. Wondering what’s next? How do I answer questions I don’t understand? And then a gentle thought told me, “this is it. The season is new and so are you.”

Jazz filled the room, existence around me started to dance and gleam… My soul was feeling restoration of warmth fill in places I was unaware needed nurturing. Questions I don’t hold the answers to are not worthy of worry, instead God steps in.

Let us remember the very design of faith – in moments of stillness, He is working on movement. In places we are cold, warmth is on it’s way. In any void, He will fill. In any shift, He is there waiting.

“This is it. The season is new and so are you.”

-Sadianne Joyce

Virtue Defined

Emotions running through my blood, reminding me how alive and blessed I am to live a life granted. Sometimes it’s important to center all of our thoughts, our purpose, the joy we are capable of.

Ask yourself, what confirms my existence? What confirms my purpose? Tears begin to run down my face, making me understand the very reason of my creation.

We gather and forget what we are here for. Let us be reminded why we all live in the same place. It is not to feel crowded, invaded or anxious. I find people full of love everyday, and if I feel a shortage, I wish to offer a hand, wanting to remind them of why happiness is something we’re all capable of. I listen to hear God’s voice, I become a steward of blessing when I speak through him and when I give through him. When I become a blessing to others I am blessed with confirmation. I am rewarded with confirmation of knowing my very purpose. My purpose in life is not something to grasp, it is not a goal to reach, it’s not a day I look forward to. My purpose is now. It is present time that deserves indulgence. Every breath, every moment, every day. My purpose is to step outside of ordinary, to become something deeper than just a surface level, existing conversation. I wish to comfort and warm where cold hits and wishes to settle. I am created to admire, to look in the eyes of despair and pray for light. I’m here to look into the eyes of joy and feel them inspire. When I give joy, I receive joy – because within offering is foundation.

The design of my body was given as I continue to be the designer of my spirit. I am fulfilled with worthiness when I design by surrendering.

“I would rather be what God chose to make me than the most glorious creature that I could think of; For to have been born in God’s thought and then made by God is the dearest, grandest, and most precious in all thinking.” -C.S. Lewis

Surrendering is one of our strongest abilities. Surrendering to what God has called upon us, in front of us and behind us is not an easy task, but it is needed in order to understand pure reason. My motives are to let go of control. I no longer try to calculate what does not make sense. I stray from paths that do not lead to a holy place. I no longer move forward forgetting that I am chosen and a plan is crafted. I am yours God while I am still mine, experiencing this is virtue defined. I will only desire change if it is called by you. I will only trust where I feel you live. I only indulge where I can serve purpose and purpose can serve me. Unease and confusion does not tempt me. I no longer invite the unknown unless intuitive discovery calls. I will not go where I feel you afar. I cannot seek for something that is already inventoried within.

I have heard your voice, your comfort, your wisdom in places I have needed it – This is ALL I need. I will continue to be the very creation you called upon this Earth. I will continue to live as a daily reminder of what I am capable of – what we all are capable of.

I will continue to surrender.

-Sadianne Joyce

Collections

Becoming more aware of our collections will allow us to be more present when another moment is to be grasped, tucked away and kept to add with the others. Let us credit ourselves for all of the beauty we seek and then keep. The views we give our full attention to are not just views at all – they are masterpieces being added to our inside studios and displays. Part of what defines us is what attracts us. What attracts us allows us to expand our minds in admiration and creation.

MY COLLECTIONS

Sunsets and conversations as warm as the hues releasing themselves to our sky. Open space that allows my heart to feel like it was just exposed to a fresh slate.

Melodies and songs that move my body and make me reach to turn the volume up. A velvet, sultry voice that I know when I hear. Dancing that is not just movement but need.

Memories that even thinking upon shape me from content to enthralled. Lessons that are learned and used to keep me on the greater path, where wild flowers grow.

The smells of a cafe, the sound of coffee brewing and mugs clinking into a busy hour. Different storefronts that display what they wish to define their business.

Vintage photographs and postcards with love notes.

Fresh air whether it’s surrounded by morning dew or night stars. The sound of natures song, the birds singing and branches swaying.

Being heard and the proof of being seen. Silent conversations and moments of intuition. Smiles from strangers and compliments in passing.

Inspiration dripping from personal style and originality. A backstory of a unique piece, the travelling it has done, the reason behind being worn.

Words that are so much more than just a noise. Words that are so much more than something to be read. Books that hold meaning and stories that are told in vulnerability.

Risks and adventure.

Kisses and energy. Love given and love received.

Collections can be physical belonging that we bring home and cherish, but they can also be moments of silence. Collections can be the intangible. The free offerings life gives us gracefully.

As a child I never picked up a stone that looked perfect, but the ones that were unique and different from the rest. In personal experience, imperfection allows me to see more beauty. When we reach out to grasp something beautiful, something beautiful will reach back and shift us.

I’ll continue to collect, gathering the moments and wildflowers along my path. With my collections I am not experiencing a place outside of myself but rather carrying what shapes me within myself everywhere I go.

I am continuously expanding larger because I carry and add treasure in every breath I take.

-Sadianne Joyce

Poetic Prose

“Give me a museum and I will fill it.” Pablo Picasso

Someone once asked me, what does art mean to you? A forever changing answer, a forever inspiring response.

To put in words… I would say… Speaking emotion, feeling emotion. Forgiving and apologizing. Being so real that after I release not only words but energy, I feel naked. It’s change in comfort. The way people look back after walking away. It’s treasures we keep, the gold and the silver. It’s saying what you want to say and feeling like truth. It’s the magic part of life that gives us answers, even when we don’t go looking. The ah-ha moments. The intuitive messages. It’s connecting with the ones like myself, the ones who carry the same mystery in discreet fact. I call it the art of just knowing.

If you were to feel me in the way I feel for you, the depths under surface level would be exposed. I can take someone, some thing in with my eyes diving deep inside. Seamlessly like hands at your sides. Art is forgetting the calm and indulging in a storm. The thunder is heard and lightning is born. The sound of souls that glide, this is when night comes alive – I’ll take you there. I’ll show you here. It’s poetic prose and unheard lyrics. I can switch gears and turn something to music.

A craft so unique a heart craves to eat. I can shape you, form you, I see you in a God’s view. Art is energy that’s contagious, a love that’s courageous, opposite of tasteless.

A burning passion to what calls my name. Perfection in aim. Undeniable attraction, I’ll present you creation Picasso couldn’t imagine.

-Sadianne Joyce

Blooming Heart

To compare faith I imagine it as a sunrise. A calming, in awe moment that I choose each morning when I wake. There is no work that needs to be done when experiencing something that our heart and soul indulges in, this is what I love most. The ease and acceptance in watching something unfold in elegance. I step out and choose to believe in what rises and I accept the truth in what does not.

I’ve experienced people around me in despair because of impatience, lack of result, doubt, anxiety and the simple fact of not knowing how to walk in faith.

Patience is a virtue. Virtue is defined by nobleness of spirit, honesty and purity. Patience is one of the hardest struggles we face, we want and we want now. Imagine that we live a life while creation is happening behind the scenes, something so intangible we have yet to understand. This is how I imagine patience. A process happening and the stillness before the action of soon aligning.

“When you plant seeds in the garden, you don’t dig them up everyday to see if they have sprouted yet. You simply water them and clear away the weeds – you know that the seeds will grow in time. Similarly, just do your daily practice and cultivate a kind heart. Abandon impatience and instead be content creating the causes for goodness; the results will come when they’re ready.” Bhikshuni Chodron

Results are not always immediate. Often times we become frustrated because all of our physical work and determined actions still have us at a distance of what we’re working towards. All the sweat and tears… yet we’re still waiting. Why is this happening? The reasons could be endless. Whether we are working towards something that does not yet have purpose or what we’re working towards isn’t ready for us… We often become comfortable with pain and unsatisfying results that we forget to be vulnerable. There is divine purpose that I believe in that causes people to stress when it could be transformed to overall peace. Trust in this.

Transformation is not always a jaw dropping experience, a surprise or gasp for air. Sometimes transformation happens slowly and sometimes it happens right before our eyes. We can be working on something for so long we forget our reason. We can be taken for a whirlwind and think that everything we thought we wanted is exactly opposite of what we’re presented with. Maybe it will be greater than what we imagined.

There does not need to be doubt in something we have little control over. It is inevitable that we make choices, this is how we survive – but understand that faith alone is promising you overall guidance, growth and destination. Doubting this will make you feel alone, but you are not and you will never be.

Regardless of the time it takes, you will get where you are meant to travel. You will be who you are called to be. As long as you focus on the small transformations and God given joys you will be at peace. There will come a time that you will find you are no longer tense, worried or distraught.

Always have the courage to keep going and when it seems harder than usual, communicate. You will ask God to come into your life. You will live in faith and through trust. You will realize that all the hard work isn’t hard at all. You will not be the one working – Trust in this process. Allow time by understanding you are dealing with a craftsman. There are fine details that need focus and attention – but understand you can relax because God is good. God is working. God is here.

Opening my heart has been one of the most beautiful processes I’ve ever gone through. I am softer than I’ve ever been. I move like wind, becoming light and approachable. I am a river flowing around obstacles, continuing on my way in grace. Not one thing can stop me. I have been planted and I will grow. In the unknowing and the unseen I will trust that I am on my way to blooming. There is no need for worry. Today is the day.

The sunset reminds me of trust. That although the day has come to an end, another beginning is near by. We lay our head and close our eyes knowing that the promise of another day is one sleep away. The next morning the sunrise deserves to be trusted. The day has arrived and so will you. Again and again, dear God I am with you.

-Sadianne Joyce